Sunday, November 22, 2009

Thank you everyone...

Saya tak reply kepada komen dalam entry lepas sebab di sini saya akan reply secara umum...

Everyone...

Yang mesej kat sini, yang call, yang mesej kot tempat lain....

To all those who took that extra few minutes to actually help me get me back up on my feet...

All I can say is "THANK YOU".

Semoga tuhan membalas budi baik anda semua.

After all the nasihat, all the prayers and all the tears...

it seems that the only road that I have in front of me is to stay...to finish what I have started.

Jihad bukan sahaja di medan perang, jihad ada dalam diri setiap insan.

This is my jihad.

This is my battle.

"Allah pilih Zeti tuk datang ke Jepun sebab Allah tahu Zeti mampu..."
Dijah Saad

Inspiration can come from the most unexpected places, the most unexpected people.

みんな、本当にありがとう。心より感動します。皆のおかげで皆の力で私頑張り続ける。

Saya berdoa agar di setiap kesusahan kita, Tuhan akan susuli ia dengan kesenangan. (Amin)


May Allah light our way always...

" A person who falls lower to the ground, jumps higher from those who have never fell..."
Nun-san

Sunday, November 15, 2009

またかよ~~~~~~

Tak sampai pun 12 jam lagi since I've reached back to Japan....and yet the only thing that I can think of is going back.

People...I need your help.

I can't make this decision on my own. Dah merata aku tanya. Yet, people always say...It's up to you...or "Entahlah, aku pun tak tau sangat."

The big Q dah timbul balik, and this time, I want to know what you guys think.

SHOULD I STAY? or SHOULD I GO BACK?

Here are the points that I have in my head -

Reasons why I want to go back
*sejak start masters, asyik fikir nak balik, sebab sangat2 stress. Tak pernah rasa stress macam ni ever in my life. Stress sampai at times I can stand in front of the railway track in think of..... (even though I know I would never do it, so don't worry lah yer)
*Rasa bazir jer masa dok pergi kelas and understanding only 50% of what the teachers are saying. (it's like, kalau aku nak jadi lecturer, I should be understanding what is being taught so that aku boleh balik ajar nanti...tak ke gitu?)
*Tiap kali balik Mesia, lepak ngan kawan ngan family, sumer stress hilang begitu sahaja.
*Tengok kawan2 kerja dapat duit, ada kereta, start kawin...stress free life, rasa best sangat. Rasa cam...kenapa aku dok stress2kan diri?
*Nak dok ngan mak sebab la ni mak dok sorang.


Reasons why I'm still here =
* Ramai orang kata nak mai lawat aku, so kalu aku balik, depa takleh nak datang.
*Malu kalu aku balik gitu tanpa ijazah
*Rasa macam alang2 dah nak habis satu tahun,baik tahan jer.
*Kalau fikir, balik nanti, dapat ijazah from Nihon, UP la skit kot peluang kerja ke apa.
*Taknak malukan mak.
*Taknak malukan Malaysia.
* Taknak orang lain tengok aku as a LOSER.

Kalau tengokkan atas tu, most of the reasons why I'm still here, is because of orang lain. NOT BECAUSE I WANT TO.

Kalau ikutkan hati, memang nak balik.

Tapi sebab pikir2 orang lain, terus jadi tak nak balik.

Owh yer, options if I do go back -
*Apply KPLI. Jadi cikgu english. Even though my english is far from perfect, kalau suruh ajar dak sekolah darjah 2 tu bleh la kot insyaAllah.
*Kalau at one point I decide to get back into studying, apply la kot lecturer's scheme USM ke. Hari tu dah dapat, tapi since dapat monbusho, depa kata takpe...pi bawah monbusho. Sebab depa nak jimat duit la tu.
*Cari kerja kat tempat kawan2 skang kerja a.k.a - astro, TV3, RTM, ITNM...dll.
*Sambung kat Malaysia coz maybe kat sana kurang skit stress. Plus faham apa cikgu ajar, senang nak buat research (sebab senang nak baca buku, kat sini kena pulun tukar kanji la apa). Plus, kalu stress pun, leh lepak kat mamak ngan kawan2, terus hilang stress sementara.

So guys, do help me out. Benda macam ni memang susah nak decide, and I can't do it alone. I don't know who else to turn to. Please....help me...

Mata dah bengkak nangis.

Nak study, hati tak tenteram, stress.

Nak balik, baru jer sampai tadi.

Help me people.

Friday, October 30, 2009

27 Tuxedos

Banyak soalan saya nak tanya kali ni.

Bila la agaknyer saya akan stat buat research yang patut dah lama stat, or yang patut dah boleh dirumuskan ini?

Bila la agaknya saya nak dapat jadi kurus?

Bila la agaknya orang rumah bawah ni nak pindah? (saya nak masuk umah dia bleh tak?huhu~)

Tapi, sebenar-benarnya soalan yang bermain di fikiran saya malam ini adalah...

Bila la agaknya saya pulak akan dapat amik gambo cam depa depa tu?

Gambor apa?

Hmmmm...gambar camni :


eh, bukan2...itu bila2 pun boleh..hehehe...I just don't have the guts this kid has~


gambo gini sebenarnya :

paham2 ajerler yer.


Kenapa saya bukak topik ni? Ini adalah kerana-
*sejak awal tahun hari tu, ramai kawan2 dah stat naik pelamin
*umur dok naik tak turun2 dah
*gatal
*rasa nak jadi cantik pakai baju cantik
*pressure

Basically sumer kat atas tu related, kecuali no 3 ngan 4 lah.

Once most of us reach a certain age, we look around and start to realize that one by one your friends have to pull themselves out from the "howdy rowdy lets lepak sana sini" group, attatching themselves to a much more important role in life; "the life of marriage". Bila kawan dah ramai yang kawin, then the pressure starts to pile on. sikit2, lama2 jadi bukit.

Bila la agaknya aku pulak yer?" = the ultimate question that pops up each time I get invitations, each time I look at wedding pictures of kawan2 yang dulu kala sewel, tapi kini dah sopan santun jadi bini orang.

For the guys, pressure to mungkin tak datang so early, but bagi orang perempuan, most (I can't say all) will, at one point in thier lives, start to feel how I feel and ask themselves the same question.

Sebab tu lah ada cerita "27 Dresses" dan bukannya "27 Tuxedos".

Girls tend to think about it more than man, I guess.

Ya, saya tahu, InsyaAllah, kalu ada jodoh tu tak ke mana. Enjoy being single while you can...bla bla bla
Saya tahu, saya tahu.
Tapi biasalah...
Saya hanya seorang gadis.
You can't blame me for wanting a fairytale life now can you?

To all those yang still takder sapa claim lagi, saya doakan...

Semoga Tuhan pertemukan kita dengan that one and only, Perfect Person. InsyaAllah.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

How was my THURSDAY ?

I find that most of the people who actually stop by here, are more interested in reading about how things work in Japan rather than me rambling about my ferociously wild emotions that don't ever seem to keep still.

Therefore, from now on, I'll try (yes, TRY!!!) to incorporate more of how it is living here in Japan, and not on how it feels being here in Japan.

To start things of, here's what I did today, a pretty little Thursday with no classes, no meetings (ada, tapi ponteng! down with meetings!!!!!!) just a day to maybe sit back at home, catch up on some undone work or to go round and do some errands.

Today, I shall treat you to my special trip tu the 箕面市役所(Minoo Shiyaku Sho) a.k.a Minoh City Hall. I have just moved out from the insanly convenient and cheap hostel into a house that is about 20 minits up-hill walk to campus. I'll show you my trip to school on another entry. Back to the City Hall thingy. Here in Japan, once you move to a new place, you have to go register yourself as the new tenant and at the same time, report to the Post Office to forward any mail sent to your previous place to your new place. It sounds really troublesome but it's all worthewhile. I defenitely woudln't want any crazy old person receiving my love letters now then would I?

So, to go to the city hall, I have to take a bus, scheduled to leave at 8.35. I wake up get ready and have breaky.


Breaky here is either bread, cereal, or nothing. No nasi lemak, no bihun goreng, and of course, no roti canai yang sedap lagi enak lemak berkerim. My breakfast today is a banana and a fresh cup of O.J. (beware! - may cause instant urge to rush to toilet)

That's my new (or you can say OLD) house. I'm on the second floor. The person below me is an old guy. Things aren't so good between us. I love running around on my floor. He hates me running around on his roof.haha.

To move around, I use my trusty steed, Grey the Bycycle. Bye, bye bye cyle. It's a pass me down with paint chipping of here and there and dust as thick as the fatty layer in a polar bear.

So I get on and ride my way to the bus stop. Pass by some houses, a river...up and down, up and down we go.

Right on time, at 8.35, the bus comes. How much? It's free. Service buses to hospitals, old folks homes and the city hall are free. The only bad thing about it is that it's gonna be full of old people so you have to give up your seat anyway.

I got on at one of the earlier stops so all the cute grandmama's and grandpapa's are still waiting somewhere to steal my seat.

After a 30 min bus ride, I reach the city hall.

Sat down and waited my turn.

There was nobody there, but my nomber was, 108!

Owh wait, its 801!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm gonna be here forever!!!!!!!!

But no, it took me barely 15 minuites and I was done.

It's only 9.20 and the bus back to my place is at 10.23...hmmm...what do I do?

Headed to the bank, ran some other erands and totally forgot to take pictures...la di da.

9.30...hmm...Why not head to Daiso then? (Daiso is a 100 yen franchaise shop all around Japan, macam kedai 2 ringgit kat malaysia, kat KL pun ada tak silap.)

So I walked happily to Daiso...

Passed a cute flower shop.....


.....to find Daiso CLOSED! It's either I wait till 10, or just head back to the bus stop.
So to avoid missing the bus, I hang my head low, sad that I can't shop, and head back to wait for the bus.


I thought I was early, but wait...Japanese people are always there before you!

Since I couldn't make it to Daiso, I stopped by Konimiya, a small supermarket just 5 minits from my house.

With intentions to by NOTHING OTHER THAN RICE, I endded up with....




pesanan to bakal suami - please do not let me go shopping alone kalau dah kawin nanti. Jenuh duit habis nanti!!! Yabai (Teruklah!)

Well, with all my unnecessary groceries, I headed of home.


The pretty cosmo's that bloom in Autumn are one of my favourite flowers in Japan. Cosmo's come in pink, purple, white, yellow and orange. The last time I went to look at Cosmo's was last year in Tokyo. The pictures are here.

After a tireing morning, I sat myself down and got to work, depriving myself of lunch, unless I manage to finish what HAS to be done.


Fine day's like this don't come often. Day's that you don't mind to spend by yourself, to just sit by the window, and enjoy Allah's work of art.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Stranded

I've been on the move for the past 20 hours.

Dorm - 0600 11/8/09
Kansai Airport - 0900~1630
Kota Kinabalu - 2030~2250
KLIA - 0130 ~ ?? 12/8/09

Delay kat KAnsai airport. Flight patut kul 11 pagi, jadi kul 4 petang.

Delay kat KK Airport. Flight patut 2155 jadi 2250.

Skang...tunggu makcik aku amik.

KFC = TUNDA SEHARI SEBAB DAH TUTUP n I'm full from all the orange juice and airoplace food.

Walaupun I haven't yet reached home betul2, dah bestlah sampai Malaysia. Just rasa takut skit. Takut ngan manusia. Should I be? I think I should. Should I? hmmm.....masa2 ni lah I want a to have a suami to kepit...hahaha....

NAK KEYEPSI~~~~~~~

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Signing off...for a while

Diriku...

Balik Malaysia...

So takkan berbeloging tuk sementara...

Pulang kepada hidup di dunia realiti.

Will try to update...

LEH MAKAN KFC!

YEAY~

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Apa itu Nomikai dan Izakaya?

Semalam pi party farewell tuk 2 budak Lab a.k.a 院生室 yang akan pi buat teacher training oversea for the next year or 2. Sorang pi China sorang pi Vietnam.

Well...kat Jepun ni kalau ada Welcome ke, farewell ke, and every other reason to celebrate, sure akan ada 飲み会 (のみかい)[nomikai] literally translated jadi Jumpa Minum...so basically its a party minum2 lah.

Tapi jangan khuatir adik2 abang2 ibu2 dan bapa2 sekalian, saya SUKA MINUM TAK MINUM........minuman keras.huhu~

Benda Nomikai ni biasanya akan diadakan di 居酒屋 (いざかや[izakaya] literal = kedai duduk minum arak.

Makan bukanlah focus kat kedai2 ni.Biasanya makanan dia satu pinggan kecik, share ramai2. Bagi kita yang tak minum ni, pi nomikai ni agak waste of money. Why? Because the bill is always split sama rata. Tak kisah la ko minum Wine 11 botol atau ko minum jus ribena setengah cawan, we all pay the same.

First time experience aku kat Izakaya was a disaster. Aku tak tau pun yang bill dia main split2.So cam biasa....bukak menu, browse kat bahagian yang leh makan, then pilih yang agak murah. Turns out that what I did was ABSOLUTELY WRONG.

Tip bagi mereka2 yang maybe akan ke Jepun atau suatu hari nanti akan jejak kaki ke Izakaya ni:- since we don't drink which also means that our drinks are always the cheapest of all, when they ask you what you want...always go for the expenzive dishes.Amikla hokke ke, sushi ke, cheese fry ke, apa2 jerla yang ko nak.Order jgn tak order sebab kalu tak, you'll just be paying for thier share of liqour and rasa sangat ripped off.

After going to numerous nomikai dah, I've learnt one secret. Kalau well established Izakaya, dia punya menu sangat fancy so just go through and look for those exotic drinks. Cuba jerla benda baru. Usually dia akan ada Non-Alcohol cocktail, Fruit smoothies, Fruit Punch ke apa...bantai jer order asalkan MAHAL.hahaha. In the case of smaller Izakaya ( jenis yang menu pun tulis cobi-cobi jer, ask the waiter ada tak non-alcohol cocktail yang dia leh bancuh. Kalu dia baik, dia bagi kita pilih apa yang kita nak bancuh. Harga?BIARKAN...sebab nanti bayar ramai2.hahaha.

Mungkin korang rasa aku kejam sebab suka2 hati nak order benda mahal kan?kan? Tapi bayangkan kalu diorang order alcoholic drink yang harga 500 yen sementara ko order coke 200 yen.Dia minum satu pun tak sampai ko nyer 2 gelas. Tak ke rugi. Pastu kita kena cover kat makanan lagi. Diorang sure oder benda2 daging2 yang kita takleh nak jamah tu...so apa lagi...ODER IKAN MAHAL2! Asalkan poket bahagia..hahaha.

Anyway...yng aku nak bebelnya adalah semalam nyer farewell party tu rege 3900 yen (~RM130) and aku amat tensen sebab aku segan nak oder makanan.Minum plak dok bantai oren ngan pineapple bengong. Tensen sebab ada menu air best depa ni awal2 lagi dah letak atas lantai dan aku tak nampak.Tensen sebab ngan harga RM130 tu aku leh belanja diri aku makan STEAK BESAR kat malaysia.huhu~ Takpolah. Nak buat camana. Aku balik semalam makan pasta diam2.huhu~ lapor la katakan.

Ni ha gambor skit2 makanan semalam.

Benda yang aku leh makan hanyalah yang tengah iaitu Sotong Goreng ngan Udang. Tapi bukan tuk aku sorang...kena kongsi ngan lagi 5 orang.

Ni lagi satu menyedihkan.Pasta goreng ngan bebola keju goreng.Bebola keju tu ok lagi.Spageti goreng tu..adeh...ikat buat penyapu pun takpa..huhu~

Ni jerla makanan yang aku dan makan banyak sikit sebab depa tu dah dok sibuk gelak2 akibat kemabukan. Aku ngan kawan aku share ini pudding manggo.Makan lam Lesung Batu..hahaa..buat la kat umah yer..mesti mak mertua suka :P